Your Plant Horoscope


Today we visit the horoscope of plants born on March 23, 2002.

Since they don’t fit any of the regular plant horoscope signs, we must assign them a new sign for that day: Piggallia Minor.

Cactus born on that day are likely to be picky eaters, selfish lovers, momma’s boys, and Nader-voters.

Pigallian Minors: This week is the most important week of your life. You must get bees to your pollen by Wednesday, or your chances for romance will collapse into a black hole of despair and desperation; you will die a horrible aphid-infested death. On the other hand, if you succeed, and are favored by the bees, you will be honored for a thousand years among your progeny. Your seed will be collected by Monsanto and turned into an aphid-resistant strain that contains a vicious insecticide in your genes. You will not only be the parent of billions of plants for a thousand years to come, but you will also be responsible for the extinction of thousands of species. You go girl!


    
    
  Cactus and Succulents
  Bamboo
  Perennials
  Carnivorous Plants
  Airplants

  Sign up for our Monthly Newsletter

Categories

February 2018
M T W T F S S
« Jan    
 1234
567891011
12131415161718
19202122232425
262728  

US Constitution

Videos



We Get Questions

Email your questions to:

blog [at] cactusjungle [dot] com